panggilan illahi - part i

our neighbour passed away recently. rumah belah depan, selang dua pintu ke kanan. suaminya makcik lat. arwah pakcik tu dah lama jugak kami tak nampak. dulu selalu nampak dia time petang-petang, dok perembat cucu2 dia balik umah. peh tu kalo arwah batuk, memang signature lah. satu kampung boleh dengar. raya baru ni, makcik pah sebelah ni ada bagitau arwah tak baper sihat. buang air merata, terbaring aje, kurang bercakap, etc. and i had the thought "kalo pakcik ni meninggal, sudahnya memang langsung tak bertegurlah aku ngan dia". and that's the fact. i have never spoken to him, and i will never ever talk to him anymore. kami masih confuse nama pakcik yang arwah ni. makcik leha depan ni kata nama dia mahmud. tapi makcik pah sebelah ni macam sebut noor. for the time being kami panggil arwah pakcik lat la ye

living in an area with most are pakcik, makcik made me sometimes "different" and "alienated". kalo bersembang, cite anak cucu. kami ni, anak ada la sorang ni ha. cucu ada jugak. tapi cucu sedaralah tapinya. itupun kadang-kadang tak kenal. jadi bila pakcik lat ni meninggal, truthfully, kami tak tau nak buat apa. when i came back from work, i looked at umah makcik lat macam ada kenduri. tapi kenapalah sunyi sangat. nak kata ada orang meninggal, takde pulak penanda kain putih tu. kebetulan pulak hari khamis malam jumaat. cuti sekolah pulak tu. my assumption was, makcik lat buat kenduri untuk sedara-sedara ajelah agaknya. tapi bila i nak tutup pintu, i saw makcik pah gi umah makcik lat pakai tudung putih. peh tu nampak makcik ana pun masuk umah dia pakai tudung putih. heran ni... takan gi kenduri berjanji nak pakai tudung putih kot? dalam kul 7:30pm, i called makcik pah. and she confirmed that pakcik lat had passed away at about 5:30pm. i called ayu sebelah dengan akak aishah to let them know as well.

malam tu, i jadik serba tak kena sebab made belum balik. bad traffic from banting. makcik pah pulak nak pegi lepas isyak. peh tu nak kuar, ada orang surau dah datang mengaji lepas maghrib. segan pulak... at this very moment, i felt sooooooo ashamed of myself. and at this very moment, i teringat uwan. if i were uwan, i would definitely, put on my proper baju, took my wudhuk, put on my sandal and headed to makcik lat's house. definite! but i was not uwan. i kept asking myself, what would i do there? how could i help? how much should i give as sedekah? where should i sit? what should i say? you know..

finally made arrived and we made our moves. lucky me, i saw makcik leha & makcik lat. i didn't feel so much strange for the familiar faces. after made has recited yaasin, i took a seat next to arwah pakcik lat and recited yaasin. then i saw makcik pah. i felt no different from others. after a while, we went home. i felt strange, but not so..

friday night was the first day of tahlil. again i had question marks. what should i do? where do they cook? should i wear something nice or just makcik-makcik's style? where should i sit? oh! pathetic! finally i was at makcik ana's house, had chat with makcik lat's younger sister and enjoyed watching makcik lat's nieces & sisters's mee hoon soup feast. i helped a bit with the makan-makan. and i ate with the makcik-makcik sambil mengadap periuk belanga. straightaway, my thought was, "ok.. peh ni aku kena tolong basuh periuk ni". fortunately, tak payah pun.. makcik ana kata, anak sedara makcik lat ramai. boleh tolong basuh. siap dia ajak sembang dengan dia. :D i did and i enjoyed the conversation.

and she made me rindu uwan :(

i am glad that we have made decision to move into this neighbourhood. i admit that my first year of moving transition was not a good start. but now i have started to blend well with the community. i am blessed to have such lovely neighbours (forgive me, with exception to my front door neighbour).

all and all, i believe, all things are up to me. if i were to stay with my own tempurung and kepompong, i wouldn't be enjoying the meaning of neighbourhood. despite that all my surroundings are makcik-makcik, i believe, what really count are my effort. i want to get to know them, i need to see them. i want them to help me, i need to help them. i want them to know me, i need to know them first. things are always vice versa.

they are my moms & dads..

my neighbours. makcik lat is the one in red